why?

Why am I afraid to express how I feel?

Why do I keep my head down, don't turn around, don't look into his eyes

when I really want to?

Why do I suppress my urges--

pretend to be calm and docile

when my heart says to dance and jump around?

Why do I take this life for granted and

live as if I will be here a hundred years?

What if I die tomorrow and

nobody sheds a tear?

Why do I fear failure, fear death, fear success?

Forever scared to take the next step?

Why am I so afraid to be myself

and love who I am in spite of my flaws?

Why do I care what the world says--

does it really matter?

In the end,

it won't matter if I lived up to people's expectation of me;

this one life will be mine to own up and take space

because when I'm there taking my final breath

I want to recall

all the beautiful memories I made and

recall all the love I felt

and be proud of the fact

that I lived life with joy, love, gratitude, being unapologetically myself.